The Telegraphers Who Spilled Too Much Tea
Two railroad telegraph operators make the mistake of gossiping about a bridal couple over the wire, only to find the groom is a company superintendent.
The story, cleaned up
A cleaned-up reading of the newspaper page: spelling and layout repaired, one story lifted off a crowded page. It follows the original closely but it is not a transcription. The original page is below; read it if a detail matters.
A well-to-do young man recently married and started West on his bridal tour. The happy young couple were breakfasting at a station eating house. During the repast two smart Alecks came into the eating room and seated themselves opposite the contracting parties. They were telegraph operators. By delicate poising of their knife and fork they were able to make sounds in close imitation of telegraphing. In the mystic language of the key one said unto the other. 'Ain't she a daisy, though?' The party thus addressed replied by clicking off: 'Wouldn't I like to kiss her, the little angel!' 'Wonder who that old bloat is that she has married?' 'Some gorgeous granger, I reckon,' replied the other. The groom stood it until forbearance ceased to be a virtue, when he also balanced his knife, and click, click, it went in rapid succession. It was intelligible to the very twain that had recently made fun of its author. When interpreted it read: 'DEAR SIRS I am Superintendent of the telegraph line upon which you work. You will please send your time to headquarters and resign your positions at once. Yours, SUPERINTENDENT TELEGRAPH.'
“Wonder who that old bloat is that she has married?”
This is the 19th-century equivalent of an employee accidentally posting their private thoughts on a public social media thread. The lesson remains: never assume you're speaking in a private language in a public space.
From readers
No comments yet. If you know something about this story — a correction, a family memory, a source — it belongs here.