The Election Week Hangover
A Seattle saloon keeper closes shop to avoid brawls as partisan fever turns his establishment into a battleground.
The story, cleaned up
A cleaned-up reading of the newspaper page: spelling and layout repaired, one story lifted off a crowded page. It follows the original closely but it is not a transcription. The original page is below; read it if a detail matters.
At eight o'clock yesterday morning the proprietor of a local saloon on Main Street put down the bar shutter, locked the door, and was walking off, when he was hailed by a police man. The proprietor crossed the street to the officer and said, 'Dot saloon is closed up for one week.' 'What's the matter?' asked the officer. 'Well, I stand such fooling no more. In the first place a man comes in and says, "Tilden is elected," and he kicks over the chairs. Pretty soon comes another man in and he says, "Hooray! Hayes has got in now," and he kicks over a table. Another man—in a little while—comes in and yells out "Nobody is elected anyway" and he breaks glasses. Shust like dot I have it for a week, and I am already discouraged. If somebody says Tilden is elected, I believe dot; if somebody says Hayes is elected, I believe dot; if nobody knows, I don't know either. I try for ten years to get away.' 'Yes, it has bothered me,' conceded the officer. 'Tell all the boys dot I have closed up for returns, and dot somebody can't get in,' replied the man, and he turned his face homeward.
“If somebody says Tilden is elected, I believe dot; if somebody says Hayes is elected, I believe dot; if nobody knows, I don't know either.”
The 1876 Tilden-Hayes presidential election remains one of the most contested and chaotic in American history, mirroring the anxiety that grips local businesses during modern periods of political polarization. Just as this proprietor chose to close his doors to avoid the literal destruction of his property by partisans, today's local shop owners often face similar pressures to navigate public discourse and civic unrest in their shared spaces.
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